Would anyone even care,
If I just up and disappeared?
Maybe, maybe not.
Dealing with my moments of depression is hard sometimes. And its not getting any easier. To feel alone or like you fucked up is hard to deal with. I mean its not that I asked Tim to stop calling for good today, but that I may have said something I shouldn't have to someone else. That maybe just maybe I might have brought up a subject always better left un-touched. So it seems I should be prepared to be alone anyways.
And then I wonder, who would care or notice. You people move on too quick ... you people wouldn't notice the tears of pain and hurt. What brought this mood on?! Why can't I control them? I want to control my fears and depression. I want to know I can keep the happy mood I long to keep. But for some reason it slips through my fingers like water.
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The words I long to say, but fear to hear the responses.
The Kid
What I Miss Most About Ohio...
- The word "pop" being recognized
- The Milky Way from JC
- The Airforce Museum
- Smaller Counties
- Shakes from Stake N Shake
- People willing to help a girl with a broken smoking car
- People who can drive
- Nights where the temp goes below 85 deg
- My car not hating the heat
- Hills
- Going midnight bowling for $5
- Drive thrus where you can get snacks
- Drive in Movies
- County Fairs
- Cold water actually being cold
- Cities being an hour or 2 away, not 4
- Bob Evans
- Being able to sleep with the windows open at night
Things to Read:
- Eternal Echoes
- Stranger in a Strange Land by Robert Heinlein
- The Man in the High Castle by Philip K. Dick
1 comment:
We're all pretty much alone and we all have seriously fucked up at one time or another. It's just a matter of getting used to that.
And religion is gonna come up at some point, so you won't be able to put it away forever.
I know very few people who could disappear and not be noticed, especially in this age of technology. It's been decades since anyone could just up and vanish and start a new life or end the one they have without being discovered.
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